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Christina Werdebaugh
Recent blog:=- Briefly...
Many years ago i had a neighbor with a son about 8-9 years old. One night 2 AM i heard the voices outside under my window. It was this boy with another. I debated what to do. Knock on the door of the dad's home (i didn't have his phone #)? Call the landlord for the phone number or have them call the dad? Go outdoors & talk to the boys? Call the police? I didn't know the right answer & i called the police. Who did not show up for 2 more hours & woke the parents up at 4 AM, after the boys had gone to bed.
A few days later i told the dad i had called, emphasizing that i did not know what to do & DID NOT have a phone # to call. I don't believe he heard the last part.
That was the only time i called the police.
Fast forward 5 years. The child is often in trouble, & the dad out of control & screaming at the child outside, on the side walk. The police have been to that house (townhouse) multiple times over the years. One evening, having trouble with my own (drama queen) roommate, i was outside discussing the situation with a friend of hers. The police are at the neighbor's place, again, evidently having been called by a neighbor, again. The dad, seeing me there, shrieks at me, "YOU HAVE TO STOP CALLING THE POLICE!!!"
Some situations have no good answer. Some people have so much anger & other issues that they don't allow anything else to register. Taking a guess, the sister is angry about her own Dx & is projecting it onto you.
I also hate conflict & do what i can to avoid it. I know that not doing so can completely siphon every ounce of my limited energy. I also am touched by your compassion for all folks around you & that you try to see things thru their eyes. It is sad when people pre-judge us.
Your forgiveness is exemplary. Are you also praying for her? I'm sure God is using you in a mighty way & will continue to do so, even if you never see it. I too send hugs. Such things are so painful.
Recent blog:=- Homesick
Recent blog:=- Homesick
Well, bottom line, your lesson learned is invaluable. The paradigm shift is the only way to let go. (I'm inventing terrible things that the woman may be going through to make her behave the way she did...maybe this isn't quite what I need to be doing.)
I really need time to shake this off, the Rambo Mom in me seems to want out. Love to you...it's a good thing I don't live near you, that's all I'm sayin.
Recent blog:=- Turtle Brownies
It's funny, but I don't much like conflict with others, either. I can stand up for myself around my own immediate family, but I can't do it with anyone else. Probably it stems from wanting everyone to like me, lol.
The very few times I've spoken harshly to another person, I've regretted it. Usually in those situations, it always turned out that there was something I hadn't known when I flew off the handle, and after the fact I'd find out I was wrong to have assumed whatever I was assuming. Of course, a person can only find that out if they allow the one they are attacking to get a word in edgewise, which your attacker did not. So I don't suppose she will learn any lessons from the encounter. It's kind of neat that you did, though. Good for you!
Recent blog:=- Family Reunion Photo Share
Recent blog:=- Moving On: The last Lucky post (perhaps)
But, your wisdom in reviewing the situation and your grace in thoughts and what you shared is awesome! Seriously, especially, feeling as miserable as you are. I am proud of you, Sara, although something tells me that this thought process is simply who you are. Such integrity! What a light you shine for the Lord!
Recent blog:=- Amazing Grace Indeed!
Its hard to speculate! You are right. The second we start to guess what makes her the way she is, is the second we start making our own preconceived judgements of her.
At the psych hospital, we would have new admits who were so on the offensive already at trying to prove they didn't belong. They'd curse at us, and throw things and have tantrums, and prove why someone had determined they needed some help! But that was how they operated in everyday life, and they would think their behavior is normal! That is hard to change in someone. They have to want to.
I'd love to think I could somehow do or say something to help you ;) But you actually did well on your own!!! For now I can only really support you and hope that it doesn't continue. But you'll tell us if it does right? I'm in touch with my inner rambo mom like Robin too! ;)
Recent blog:=- Just Another Manic Monday...
Praying for your sweet, bruised heart today.
Recent blog:=- let’s talk politics
So I'm trying to process all the info. All of me agrees and totally understands the 'lesson'--been there!!
But LOTS of me wants to come on over and open a can of whoop-_ss! on some REALLY REALLY RUDE people. AHH! That is AFTER I put that little 3 year old to bed! WHO IN THE WORLD would keep a kid up that late! SERIOUSLY.
oh, sorry. Got a little carried away.
So sorry that you had to endure this. Praying that this does not happen again.
Once again, you have a much better attitude than I would.
As always, BLESSINGS!!!
~Cynthia
Love to you today!
Recent blog:=- Repatriation (Part 3)
I guess the lesson here (other than the super-nice one you just wrote about): Next time, just call the police instead of banging on the ceiling. ;)
I'll get off my soapbox now...and go pray for your unkind and inconsiderate neighbors...that they will realize that the world does not revolve around them!
Recent blog:=-
Recent blog:=- Betty Crocker for a day
No being nice here, she might as well have charged my own daughter with this bull. I am so mad right now, I can hardly think. I had tears in my eyes thinking about you at that door having to listen to that garbage. .
I wish Riley would have bit her! She deserved it.
I know you prefer to look at the bright sides of things...but right now...I prefer to be mad....and I so wish I was there. I am not afraid to fight, and I will...just like a mother hen. >:o
Recent blog:=- Blue Monday : Turning Outdated Glass Jars into Art
Recent blog:=- Blue Monday : Turning Outdated Glass Jars into Art
Recent blog:=- Me, Myself & Lies: Week 1 Recap
My gut reaction is wishing I could rip someone out of their apartment and yell some sense into them. I'm shocked and outraged. But I think your response is far better and a good lesson for us all. Such spiteful, hateful words issue from a heart of bitterness. She is destined (without a heart change) to live a life of rejection, strife, brawling, and anger. MS is the least of her problems.
I had a similar situation with a neighbor and put up with it for 8 years. We asked sweetly, we asked kindly, and I wanted to be forebearing for Christ's sake. When another neighbor finally said, "ENOUGH!" and called the police, they presumed it was us and didn't speak to us for months. I decided then and there that hurting people hurt people and just acted like they were friendly and still waved and said "Hi!" when I saw them. But I also realized they mistook our kindness for weakness which allowed them to use us and cost our family a great deal of peace.
Next time, I would not engage but simply let the police handle it. Our neighbor was right and it fixed the problem immediately. I was enabling them by waiting it out so long. GOOD FOR YOU for trying SOMEthing. I'm just sorry it cost you a face-to-face with someone so scary. As usual though, you are looking for the lesson to be had and you are so right here. We do make snap judgments sometimes without REALLY knowing anything. A good reminder, Gitz. Thank you, friend.
Hugs to you and Riley. Puppy kisses from Tini.
Recent undefined:=-
It can feel awful to be misunderstood and worse...to misunderstand. If anything, my illness and others' responses to me, have definitely taught me to give the benefit of the doubt.
We never know what is happening in another's life.
I'm sorry this happened to you, but it is good to get the lesson learned. He truly does make all things work together for good...even those terrible distasteful moments we wish we could erase.
Love you, Gitz!
I think that one of your IRL friends or neighbors should write down your blog address on a little slip of paper and put it under her door. She could learn a lot from you and your integrity.
Yeah, I think I need to re-read your post for today's lesson. It just makes me mad that she was so crappy to you. :(
Recent blog:=- A Light at the end of the Tunnel
Prayers. And thank you for the insights, and willingness to be open to the other side...
(I disagree with their 'side' and their way out of line reaction, but I'll go along with other side).
Having experienced unjustified anger and judgments myself, I know the horrible sick feeling that comes after encounters such as these. I also know how easy it is to succomb to rage or self-pity or with you own preconceptions. I want to tell you that the Lord is smiling at the way that you handled this! You did exactly what He wants us all to do: "do not judge anyone so that you yourself will not be judged." Once the accusations start flying it easily can become way out of hand and easy to excuse our own bad behavior. Proud of you girl! You took the opportunity to learn something about yourself and about others also. Bravo. Thanks for sharing with us.
Recent blog:=- compelling love
Recent blog:=- Thankful Thursday
thanks for sharing this story because i need to be reminded, i'm pretty good at judging.
Recent blog:=- the remembrance of it.
Praying for you!
I onced judged someone as being a goofball and an idiot...3 years later I married him!
Recent blog:=- Growing Up
Did you ask something else too?
Recent blog:=- let’s talk politics
Recent blog:=- TOUCH
And you were seriously a MUCH better person than I would have been. Seriously. :-E
Recent blog:=- Getting Out Of The Way